“Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great.”
Doctrine and Covenants 64:33
What are your goals and values for your marriage? What do you hope to get out of it? Does your spouse share these desires? Does she/he respect them? Turn toward each other. Allow each other to be an individual, but work together to reach the goals. I have a goal of having a marriage like the general authorities. But their marriage didn’t start out that way. They worked at it. They worked together. They turned toward one another and allowed their partner’s influence into their lives. Their marriage is a reflection of true intimacy. What is intimacy? The world would have us believe that the word intimacy only describes sex, but the true definition is much deeper and more full of emotion. Intimacy is connection with one’s soul.
How do we obtain this intimate connection? This is a daily effort that must be made. One of the ways that Jose and try to maintain our intimate connection is through lunch time phone calls. Even if it is only 5 minutes long, we stop what we are doing and talk on the phone. For us, it is the simple things. I have noticed that something that helps Jose to feel open and comfortable about sharing things with me is when I listen to the little things that he wants to tell me. When we talk about the small things in our life, the big things are easier to overcome. I feel like as the years go by in a marriage, the harder it gets. There are new seasons of life and trials that you are passing through. These are uncharted territories for us, but there is always someone that we can turn to for guidance and direction. The more that we turn towards the Lord, the more that we can learn from these new experiences. He is the Grand Master and will lead us through. As we seek for this guidance our hearts and minds will be opened, especially as we do this as a couple. We must remain faithful together during the hard times. This will deepen the connection with your partner.
Not every day has a trial, but everyday we can do something to strengthen our marriages. We can build little rituals and traditions with our spouse. The greater the friendship in a marriage, the better the marriage. It may seem mundane and unexciting, but that is how you build something great: step by step or brick by brick. The more strings of companionship and friendship that you weave into the rope of marriage, the harder it is for Satan and his forces to break.